Sunday, November 11, 2012

The Greatest Announcement

Announcing the news of our referral has been fun. We've been on the phone telling the story over and over, yet never tiring of the events that unfolded on Halloween that have us over the moon with excitement for our son's arrival. But announcing the new addition to Abigail and Paige was unexpectedly, one of those family moments you never can forget.
 
We saved the news of a new baby brother for a few days. Between Halloween and school, the time never seemed right to sit them down and spring a new sibling on them. Then, on Friday evening, two days after we had found out, they got their hands on his picture. "Awwww...cute baby," said Paige (they're both obsessed with babies). We looked at each other and silently agreed with a few facial expressions that this would be a good time.
 
Just needs a prince to dance with!
"That little baby is going to be your new brother," James began. I was prepared for one of the two following reactions: 1. "We don't want a brother. We don't like boys!" or 2. "Mama, can I have some M&M's for dinner?" But rather than disinterest or despair, the announcement was met with delight.  Their eyes lit up and we could see the wheels turning in their heads so we braced ourselves for the countless questions that were sure to ensue.  Again, our expectations were off the mark.  We had anticipated queries about why this baby wasn't growing in mommy's tummy or why his skin is a different color.  But no. 
 
Their primary concern was what he was going to wear.  "We have to buy some boy clothes," Abigail declared immediately, "and some trucks and trains for him to play with."  Then they wondered where he would sleep and when we told them Nana's room (which is currently our guest room most often occupied by Nana), they decided we had to paint it blue and put lots of boys stuff in there.  Then there was worry about Nana's reaction to the boy stuff so we had to call Nana who assured the girls that it would be just fine to redecorate her room and that she actually likes boy stuff and girl stuff.  Who knew? 
 
Their new brother will surely get dressed as a ballerina
Once their questions were answered and their concerns put to rest, the excitement set in and they started acting like two little mothers.  They discussed books they would read to him and songs they would teach him.  Abigail thought Jeffrey would be a good name while Paige leaned toward Lace.  (Side note: neither name will be used.) 
 
They still haven't questioned why their brother isn't coming to us the traditional route.  And when those questions do come up, we're ready.  Until then, we're enjoying listening to the ladies make plans for their new sibling.  They have decided to put him to use as Prince Eric for their Little Mermaid performances and they've added Thomas the Tank stickers to my shopping list so he can do crafts with them.  "He doesn't like princesses Mama," they explained to me, "he's a boy!"  Yes, my dears, but I'm pretty sure he will love the two of you.

 

Friday, November 2, 2012

It's a Boy!

In a million years, I did not expect the call to come when it did.  I had spoken to Jenn, the Ethiopia adoption coordinator for Holt just days ago and she did not give me much hope that the referral would come this week.  I was thinking by mid November if we were lucky.

So when James' phone rang through on the blue tooth in our mini van at 4:35 on the way to pick up the girls from day care, and the 541 Oregon area code lit up on the dashboard, we both did a double take.  This couldn't possibly be it, could it?  So many times, the phone rang and my heart started racing only to hear the voice of a doctor's office confirming an appointment or something equally as mundane.  But when James (the voice of reason in our relationship) said to me, "Are you ready?" I knew this was it.  I should also point out that rarely do we ever go pick up the girls together.  One of us is always tying up loose ends at work or off to an exercise class, but this time, it was October 31st - Halloween - so the plan was to pick up the kids and head off to Grandma and Grandpa's, our first trick or treat stop.  The timing, then, with the two of us in the car, was perfect.

James was driving, so I struggled with his phone (which I've always hated) and couldn't seem to sync the blue tooth properly.  There were a few moments (some of the longest moments of my life!) trying to get the connection working so we could both hear properly.  Finally, the two of us and Jenn were having a conversation.  She started off by asking about how we fared in the recent hurricane (Sandy) that hit the Northeast.  I'm not at all sure what I said, but I know I was thinking, "come ooooon, cut to the chase!!!"  It wasn't long before she did.  "I've got good news for you," she began, at which point I started bawling.  "We have a little boy for you.  He is fifteen months and in good health."  Again, I have no idea what I said, if anything, but she went on to tell me what she knew about the circumstances under which he was placed for adoption, the region he is from, his name, etc. The conversation wasn't long - maybe five minutes.  My head was spinning too much to ask any questions so she said she would forward on his picture, medical reports, etc. for us to look over and we could call with questions if we had any. 

After hanging up, we had to quickly pull ourselves together.  It wasn't the kind of news you just start blabbing to the first person you see on the street.  We hadn't looked over medical reports, told family, or even decided how, exactly to tell our own children.  So, James put a sheet over his head (he was a ghost for Halloween), and we walked into daycare as calmly and normally as humanly possible (aside from the ghost costume, obviously). 

Before stopping at Grandma and Grandpa's, we swung by the package store for a bottle of bubbly which I stuffed in my giant purse.  Grandpa wasn't home, so we couldn't make our announcement right away.  Instead, the girls opened their Halloween loot and hemmed and hawed over which piece of candy they would indulge in first.  We stood around nervously chit chatting until finally, grandpa came home.  Then, I told them that the girls had gotten to try on their Nutcracker costumes at ballet that day and I have the cutest pictures.  I handed them my phone to see the pictures but it was actually a picture of their new grandson on the screen.  Once the realization hit, there were tears, hugs, and champagne - a wonderful way to kick off Halloween.

On the drive back to our neighborhood, I called my mom and told her the girls wanted to say Happy Halloween.  She was on her way out to dinner, so I told her I didn't want to keep her but I'd text her a picture of the girls in their costumes.  I hung up and texted our little guy's picture and exactly 30 seconds later, the phone rang and my eardrums nearly exploded from all the screaming.

After more trick or treating, we returned home and let the girls start counting their treats while we opened all the reports and looked at pictures over and over.  I texted my dad and asked how you pronounce XXXX?  He loves pronunciations of ethnic names, and I knew when he saw the text, he'd get the picture.  Once again, the phone rang within 30 seconds and I related the story once again.

Finally, after the kids were in bed, I called my sister - a special phone call to me since she is adopted from Hong Kong.  Before I called I texted the picture and said "Happy Halloween Auntie Emma!"  James did the same with his sister which only leaves my brothers to tell.  Since they are in Australia and New Zealand, the time difference wasn't right, but I will tell them soon.

James wasted no time getting in touch with a doctor (Lisa Albers Prock) who specializes in International Adoption from Children's Hospital in Boston.  She was very prompt in returning the email and we spoke with her yesterday morning about the medical report.  She was very thorough (as thorough as one can be when analyzing data from a third world country), but ultimately, aside from being a bit on the short side which is normal for children in care centers in Ethiopia, expressed no major concerns.  We hung up and almost immediately picked up the phone to officially accept the referral for our son.